A Clean Mind

Blogging about a less stressful way to live…

Attach-Deal-Detach

Hello folks. A nice way of describing how we’re learning to live is Attach-Deal-Detach. Hearing things in different ways has always helped me to understand more deeply, so I share things as they come in case it might help you. So… we have a situation or something we’re worried about. Or not even worried, necessarily. Just something we have to deal with. So we call it up in our mind (attach), think about it with our wisdom/common sense as much as is necessary (deal with it), and then we let go of it (detach). Sometimes there’s action to take and sometimes there’s not. But we’re not doing that frantic, chatterbox, voice in the head, low-quality thinking anymore. And when we can’t stop our mind, like when it’s a really big situation and there’s a ton of emotion, we don’t even take our thoughts very seriously. We don’t really participate. We know there’s no stopping it, and now we know that that’s okay. It’ll settle after a while and then we’ll see things more clearly.

So what’s the big deal with all of this? Why is this way of saying things helpful to some people? It’s all about the “detach” part. Because most people stay attached to everything on their plate all the time! Whatever is going on in their entire life, every situation or whatever it is that is unresolved or bugging them, is swirling around 24/7. So we’re simply practicing – and always getting better at – dealing with one thing at a time all the way to its resolution (in that moment) and then we’re telling our mind and body to let it go. And the mind starts to chill more, and the body starts to feel more spacious. That’s that deeper peace that’s underneath it all, all the time. And again, the resolution at that time might be that there’s nothing I can do now. Or it might be that I’m unsure of what to do, so I’m going to continue to let it unfold. And then we let it go for the time being. We detach.

So I invite you to pay attention and see what you’re constantly attached to. Your body will tell you with a contracted feeling, so just open up, get curious, and ask. And something will eventually pop up. And as I alluded to above, when it’s something big, you might find it impossible to detach! The mind will be on it all day long. And this is fine! But now you know what’s going on and you’re bringing innocence to the whole thing. And you’re not really trusting your thinking or even making a big deal about it. This happened with me not long ago, and that’s just where I was; that was my best at the time. And our best is our best, at the time. But we’re shifting, folks, we really are. And you’ll notice that next time something similar happens your experience will be much different. So maybe this phrasing of Attach-Deal-Detach resonates with you, maybe not. Things are always popping in my head, so I share them with you. All good. Peace out 🙂

P.S. If the holidays aren’t a good time for you, feel free to visit the Archives page of this blog. Scroll down to this time every year and maybe you’ll find some writings that help. One gold nugget can make all the difference. All the best, and I’ll see you very soon.


All anybody really wants is peace. The good news is that peace can be learned. I’m serious. This should be taught in middle school, but it’s not. So I’m teaching it now.

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