Blogging about a less stressful way to live…
Me: “You Are Not Depressed”
I’ve had the great pleasure recently of telling a few clients something like this: “I have something to tell you, so just relax and take it in. Are you ready? Okay, here we go… I don’t think you are depressed.” And then we laugh hysterically. These are people that have been labeled as having some sort of official sounding – and scary – depressive disorder. And I know that many people do have severe chemical imbalances, but that’s not who I’m talking about. Many of the ones I’m talking about have been living with this label for decades, though, so they’ve totally identified with it and believed it. And it was given to them by a doctor in the first place, so it came with lots of weight even before all those years helped to really seal it in. So for them to hear this from me is a big deal! And it is quite a joy to tell them.
Now, I wouldn’t say something like this recklessly. It only happens after we’ve been working together and they’ve really gotten what we’ve talked about. So they’ve learned that ups and downs are normal. And they’ve learned that feelings are temporary energies generally created by our thinking, and that these feelings actually want to move and leave our system. Energy moves; it is the law. And most importantly, they’ve learned that they have an incredibly smart, strong, wise, and compassionate source of thought that’s built in. We call this many names: new thought, fresh thought, inner wisdom, common sense, gut feeling, instinct, intuition, etc. So they stop paying attention to that old, conditioned thinking, that negative chatterbox that exaggerates and lies and talks fast, and they start listening to the wiser, quieter voice instead. And you know what? They start to feel better. It’s not rocket science; it’s just that the voice in the head has had lots of momentum and lots of power. Not anymore.
So after a while of living in this new way, I have to break the news to them: you don’t have a disorder! And you never did. It’s just that you’ve never been given this essential education about how the body-mind actually works. You’ve never been taught the rules of the game: that thought runs the show and that feelings generally come from that, and that you have a perfectly good source of thinking built in. Nobody ever pointed out that giving power to the frantic voice in your head (that nobody else even hears) is optional, totally optional. Wow!
So these people start to handle situations way better than before. And they know that when they have a lot going on, or they’re dealing with a tough situation, it’s normal to feel down. They don’t have a disorder; they’re just dealing with some bullish*t! If you really need a fancy clinical term for this, you can call it situational depression (wow, that post is from 2012, and we survived the end times, woohoo!). And the lows that used to last a week or more now last a couple of days, or a day, or an afternoon, or an hour or less. Big difference…
Some of these clients are taking an anti-depressant, so I let them know that they can absolutely stay on it if they want. After all, they’re the boss. And despite the impression that people can get of me, there’s never any pressure at all regarding meds; that’s not my call. But I must inform them that a person that’s not depressed probably doesn’t need to take an anti-depressant… Hahaha. So we laugh about that, and it’s really fun and empowering. It’s like a dark veil is being lifted off of them, and I get to watch from the front row.
Of course I explain that I’m absolutely not a medical doctor, so I can only give very general information about medications. And that information is that a person can taper as slowly as they want. If they’re feeling up to it, they can generally try the next lowest dose, because they can always go right back to the original dose. Also, we note that side effects from a decrease in dosage would be normal, so it’s nothing to overthink or overanalyze. And again, they can always increase it. This usually only lasts a few days or a week, anyway. Some of these folks start to feel over-medicated, though, the more they start to live in their wisdom. I’ve learned that that’s the body’s signal saying, “Hey dude, we got this!” So they can either cut the dose or get off of it completely. This is pretty cool, because these meds can have some nasty side effects that create other problems. Would you want to put on thirty pounds or more because you’re taking one of these pills? The clients I see can’t stand it, and that’s just one example, but a common one. My opinion is that less is best when possible. And why not try? Especially if they’re being supported by someone like me. But again, no pressure.
So I just wanted to share this today, the absolute honor and joy the comes from informing someone that they’re probably not depressed. Do you feel down sometimes? Yes. And so do I. And so does everybody else. And again, I’m not saying that some people don’t have a chemical imbalance that is greatly helped by an anti-depressant. I know that many do. But it is a fact that SO many others are prescribed these pills right away when they should’ve been prescribed education first! Education about how the body-mind works. Because they can always try a medication later if that doesn’t help. So there you go, that’s our story for today. And as always, please share this with someone if it made you think of them! Maybe it can give them a new perspective, and maybe it can give them some hope. And maybe it can change their life. And as always, I’m here to help if I can.